It's that simple. Everyday I live through this. Pain, hurt, fears. It's all their. The nights are the hardest. Being in Hawaii, my boyfriend is deep in a sleep by the time night rolls around here. Nothing can ever take away the pain of night. I don't know what makes it hurt so bad, besides of course feeling terribly alone. But not only bad things have been happening in my life. A ton of good, too!
One thing, is planning for Aaliyah's ninth birthday. It's in two weeks, and is looking to be a stellar party. I have also been heavily involved in her Girlscouts! My sister is a Brownie. I've also rediscovered my love for music. Surrounding my self with upbeat songs always makes a night like this difficult. I have been spending more time at the skatepark. Some of the guys there say they're "Surfing the concrete waves." I love that. I haven't met many of them, I'm shy. And I want to know who I am. I lost my identity after my first break up, but I'm getting it back. Re-identifying myself and my passions. I'm still wishy washy, though. I intend to start working on learning a song, and getting a job. But, that's for another day. I just wanted to update. Austin and I, we're doing well. I've even started going to places without him. Quite often, actually. But he's my baby, and I still have days where I need him. I love my SD. Nothing will ever change there.
Signing out,
Whitney and Austin
